Failure To Launch

March 7, 2008

It was to have been the start of something big. It was to have been my entree into a new phase of life in Hoboken.

Wednesday night I was to be at a big fund-raiser, sitting at the table with the chairman of the board, at the chic-est restaurant in town. There would be important people there, and I didn't know any of them, not even the chairman. I had bought some new clothes and I couldn't wait.

Sunday night I had the signs of some kind of cold or flu. I took my usual cold prevention remedies. I went to bed early, feeling I had nipped whatever it was in the bud. Monday I had my hair done and ate some soup. I bought some cough drops and sore throat lozenges. My throat was hurting. But I thought I was okay.

Tuesday it was worse. Feeling feverish, I went back to bed and slept most of the day. Wednesday I thought I was going to be fine. I met Cristina at Starbuck's at 1, having slept most of the morning, and had a chai latté, which soothed the pain somewhat, but I was feeling woozy and thought a little more sleep would brace me for the big event.

When I hit the bed I couldn't get up. I was getting worse. Whatever it was had given me chills, fever, the old runny nose; and I could hardly walk when I did get up. There was nothing to be done for it but to call the chairman of the board and tell him that I was sorry, I was indisposed, I just wasn't going to be able to make it. He was gracious and sympathetic, and all I could do was stagger over to the bed, fall in, and sleep for another day and night.

Yesterday it was all over. My big night hadn't happened. The crisis was past, my fever symptoms gone, but now I just had a sore throat and cold. I had an appointment for x-rays and bone density exam, just across from Starbuck's as a matter of fact, so it meant another six-block walk in the cold, but I did it happily. The x-ray clinic was comforting and efficient. Now maybe I'll get to the bottom of that pain and stiffness in my left shoulder, and maybe we'll find that my bone density is good enough that I won't have to go on calcium. But do they have a cure for the common cold?

Colds for me almost always descend into laryngitis at the end. I must conserve my voice. I must keep drinking tea. I must hydrate. I must prepare myself for my next opportunity to make my splash in Hoboken.